Saturday, 12 May 2012

Here's to the last 3 years..

Three years at University has finally come to an end, and I don't think it's sunken in just yet. It still feels like only yesterday I was moving into halls and making new friends, and now here I am, three years later, with only two weeks left in the city I've called home since 2009. I've had my fair share of ups and downs, but I've made some of the most amazing friends and made some fantastic memories, and they are ones that I'll never forget. I honestly didn't realize how hard it would be to say goodbye to everyone, but the time is finally here and I'm afraid I'm going to be a bit of an emotional wreck. Now, it's time to start a new chapter in my life and make the most of every opportunity that comes my way. So here's to the past three amazing years, to the wonderful friends I've made, the many, many messy nights out, the memories, the laughs and to the city I have called home since I was 19; you have been truly fantastic.

Monday, 16 April 2012

I don't want to grow up

I'm going to say it right now; I do not want to grow up. I don't want to be bogged down with a million bills to pay, young children running riot and never having time to do anything remotely fun. If I'm honest, I can't see myself ever having kids; I'm just really not the maternal sort. I don't go all gooey over a newborn baby, in fact the sight of one makes me want to vom. Toddlers annoy me with their constant screaming when I'm trying to do my weekly food shop, and don't even get me started on young teenagers trying to act older than they actually are. I guess I'm a little hard hearted when it comes to children, but then again I am only 21. Half of the girls I went to secondary school with are already on their second child, and are getting engaged/married and living in a council house. Where is the rush to grow up and become a proper adult? At the moment, I just want to concentrate on me and my ambitions, and just live my life to the full.

I'm enjoying having fun and just concentrating on myself at the moment. When I look to the future, I don't see children in my life. I see me spending time with my friends, working at my dream job, possibly being married and being able to have the chance to drink cocktails at trendy clubs whenever I want. After speaking to my lecturer today, she has fully confirmed how much I do not want to have children. I'm still a kid at heart, and some days I just want act like the immature person I can be. I have so many dreams and ambitions, and they will continue to grow as I steadily get older. I can't see me being stuck in one place for too long, paying bill after bill after bill, and growing resentful and bitter because I'm not out there seeing the world. I get itchy feet, and I want to be on the road all the time.

When I'm 80, I want to be able to look back at my younger years, smile and say "I had so much fun."

Sunday, 15 April 2012

I want...

I want to graduate from University with a really great grade. I want to make sure my parents are forever happy & healthy. I want to move to New York. I want to snag my dream job. I want to go travelling. I want an internship at American Glamour. I want to meet Kate Winslet and Jennifer Aniston. I want a Fiat 500. I want to win the lottery. I want to break free. I want to be able to sing. I want to visit the Hollywood Walk of Fame. I want to do something completely out of the ordinary. I want to go on a road trip. I want to meet a really great guy. I want to stop worrying about every little thing. I want to be a size 10. I want to visit the Maldives. I want to go swimming with dolphins. I want to go on the Ellen show. I want to be able to walk in heels. I want to have no regrets, no what ifs & no should haves and could haves. I want to make an impact. I want to be remembered for every little thing I do throughout my life. I want to be remembered for just being me.

What do you want out of life?

Kate Winslet

Can I just be her please?

Saturday, 14 April 2012

Let me shop!

I'll happily admit this right now; I think I have a shopping addiction. I can spend money like it's going out of fashion, even when I'm completely skint. Now my student loan has arrived and is sitting prettily in my bank, I have even more reason to buy more pretty things to add to my ever expanding wardrobe. This is what I am currently coveting;

Friday, 13 April 2012

All eyes on me

When I'm not at Uni, my home is situated in a little village that no one has ever heard of. The people that live here all know each other, and everyone is related to one another. People's lives round here are like an open book; everyone knows exactly what someone is up too, who they are going out with, who they are friends with, and that scares me. Like beyond belief.

Sometimes, I feel like I'm in Coronation Street. If I got a new boyfriend, or started hanging round with new people, or I did something really shocking, peoples curtains would be twitching with the anticipation of change. Many people are happy with this, and love nothing better than to participate in sharing other people's lives in a snippet of gossip with their neighbors.

For me though, I can't think of anything worse. I don't want my life publicized to the whole village, and I certainly don't want everything I do to be the subject of someone else's entertainment. Whatever happened to tact and privacy? Even coming back here every other weekend for my job is enough to break me into a cold sweat. Constant questions about what I'm going to do when I finish Uni, do I have a boyfriend, am I worried that I won't get a job? Seriously, I swear these people relish in seeming to want to know all the ins and outs of my private life. At first, I quite like filling people in on what I've been up too, but after a while I feel like I'm at a job interview.

The reason I'm writing all this is because in just over a month, I finish University forever, and this little village is where I'll be coming back to live for the next year.

Don't get me wrong; it's not a bad place to live. There aren't hooligans and knife crazed gangs or anything like that, but it makes me feel all closed in when I think about coming back here to live. I've got used to my independence and privacy, and I don't want to come back to something that I had when I was 18.

I'm nearly 22, and I'm full of ambitions and dreams. Half the people round here are in dead end jobs, living on council flats and are on benefits. Where's the fun in that? What's the hurry to grow up? I don't want to he tied down with a baby and shit loads of baby sick at 21 years old.

Life is for living, and that's what I intend to do. I'm going to break free from the norm of being a teen mum, and really make something of myself. I will live in this Big Brother village for the next year, but don't expect me to like it.

picture perfect

Facts #3

I have one month left at University. I want to move to London next summer. I am addicted to Tumblr. And buying shoes. I wish I was rich. I'm excited to start a new chapter in my life. I hope I don't lose contact with any of my Uni friends. I'm obsessed with my Topshop jeans and my over sized shirt. I miss getting drunk with the crazies. It scares me that I will be 22 in just over two months. My new favourite song is by a band I've never heard of before. I love walking my dog really early in the morning. Currently aching to go to Thorpe Park. All I want is a 2:1 from my Uni & a full time job on a magazine I love.

Sunday, 8 April 2012

Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Facts #2

I want to be Jennifer Aniston's BFF. I wish I could sing like Beyonce. My current obsession is Temple Run & a healthy dose of gossip. I think I have a shopping addiction. I want to live in New York. My dream job is Art Director at American Glamour. I have amazing friends. My Mum is my inspiration. I want to find a guy that looks like Ryan Gosling. It scares me that I will be 22 in four months. I want to travelling all around America in a funky car. I also wouldn't mind winning the lottery. I absolutely adore Kate Winslet. Tumblr is my new favourite website. I cannot wait to graduate in November.

Valentine's Day

So it's Valentine's Day... again. Last year, I said to my friend that this year I would not be single. Guess what? I'm still single. And you know what? It doesn't bother me in the slightest. Okay, so I was a little jealous seeing all the guys today holding big bunches of flowers and chocolates, but then I overcame that problem by popping into my local store and buying myself some Lindt chocolate. (Actually, my Mum bought them for me, but that's not the point). At this moment in time, I would say that I'm about 10 minutes away from a full on chocolate coma, and it was so worth it. For me, I'm not fussed that I don't have a boyfriend, because being single is actually pretty awesome. I can do what I want, when I want and I have absolutely no one to answer too. Chances are, if I did have a guy I'd probably have someone that hated Valentine's Day and wouldn't buy me anything, so I'd probably still find myself in my local buying myself chocolate. (Depressing, but oh so true). I'm not one of these girls that's constantly on the look out for my perfect guy, because what is it they say? 'When you stop looking for Mr Right, he will eventually pop up when you least expect it.' I do hope that's true because I stopped looking about two years ago, and there's still no sign of him. Ho hum.

Anyway, this post is dedicated to all the beautiful singletons out there, that are probably at this precise moment of time downing bottles of wine, eating copious amounts of chocolate and listening to Adele. (Don't deny it, she's the perfect singer for a single's Valentine's Day). Here's to being young, free and single!

Now, where's my chocolate?

Thursday, 2 February 2012

Take me there.

I want to live in an apartment in Manhattan. I want to work for American Glamour. I want to live near Central Park. I want to catch an American accent. I want to meet an American guy. I want to shop in Bloomingdale's and Macy's. I want to catch the subway and know exactly what I am doing. I want to be familiar with every street. I want to ride in a yellow cab. I want to feel like I've lived in New York all my life. I want it to be a completely new chapter in my life. I want to feel scared about doing it, so that it spurs me on. I want to have fun. I want a completely new direction. I want to feel independent in a new city. I want to live my dream.

Monday, 30 January 2012

Facts #1

I have under four months until I finish University for good. I have made some of the best friends a girl could ever ask for. There's nothing I love more than a proper good night out. Vodka is always a winner. I have a huge girl crush on Jennifer Aniston. I'm addicted to American magazines. New York is where I want to spend the rest of my life. I hate England. I love to write. Temple Run is my new favourite iPhone game. I'm too sarcastic for my own good. I can blag my way out of pretty much anything. My Marc Jacobs purse is the best thing I have ever purchased. I'm far too blunt. I have an addiction to orange lucozade. I can't stop listening to Beyonce's album. I'm not ashamed to admit that I kinda like Cher Lloyd's new song. My pet hate is when people continuously moan & do nothing to help themselves. I hate Valentine's Day.

Saturday, 28 January 2012

Everything is changing..

My Mum often says to me that if I ever want something in life, I have to go out there and get it. It will never come to me, if I'm just sat on my bum all day waiting for it to arrive. This is probably the best piece of advice I have ever been given, and it's something I live my life by. In 4 months time, my University days will finally be over. I will no longer be a student, and I will be expected to find a full time job, and become a proper adult. No more sleeping in until 10am, going to lectures in the afternoon, and then having the majority of the week to spend at home 'studying'. Part of me is incredibly excited to see what the world has to offer me, and then the other half of me is so scared, I could just crawl under my duvet and stay there for the foreseeable future. How has three years flown by so quickly? Wasn't it only yesterday that I was moving into my halls of residence? Now, instead of worrying about what to wear for my fourth night out in a row, I'm now worrying about where to look for a job, and if I'll have enough money to survive.

However, I think out of all my Uni friends, I'm the one that's the most excited to leave. I find it so exhilarating that in a matter of months, I will be completely and utterly free of all Uni work and deadlines, and will be
able to do whatever I like. I will no longer have nerves in my stomach waiting for my grades to come back, or even having to face some of my worst lecturers in the corridor. Obviously, I am going to have to search for a job/internship, and I understand that will be stressful in it's own way, but that's life. I also know that come May time, I will probably be sobbing into my vodka/lemon/lime at the thought of having to leave all my amazing Uni friends and the memories we have shared these past three years. It really is true what people say: Uni friends are for life. They are the people that you see almost every single day, and who know exactly what you are going through with the trials and tribulations of Uni life. If I'm honest, I couldn't have asked for better friends.

So right now, I'm trying to make the most of my time here at Uni, stop moaning about eve
ry little thing, and just embrace it. And when it's all done and dusted, I'm going to go out into the big, scary world and show them what I can do. I'm going to grab everything with both hands, and make sure my degree was worth every single penny.